Today's Reading
My goal is to give you the means to be your own best and best- informed supporter, affected by anxiety but not diminished by it.
The insight/action self-therapy offered here will help most, though, when you find yourself in these pages, when you discover what "fits" and go further with that than I have. No one knows more than you do about your own life—or what you long for. No one knows which stories spun in your own mind enlarge your sense of yourself, or fragment it. Anxiety, after all, does many things, but it cannot encourage the subtle, creative, self-trusting attitudes you need. It doesn't value curiosity. It doesn't inspire you to be more appreciative, more forgiving, more enchanted with life. Self-valuing like that does more than reduce the pain anxiety brings. It can recharge your entire being.
Last, but definitely not least, what I also offer here—as a creative writer trained in psychotherapy and ministry—is a raft of ways to discover and use your own unique creativity.
Creativity is the asset that will seldom fail you. It is a way of living (and regarding yourself) that lets you see new possibilities, rather than closed exits that might already have failed you. It is also a way of further befriending your mind, particularly if you feel your body-mind has been letting you down.
It lets you discover day by day and experience by experience the continuously unfolding promise of your life. It lets you ask, "What's needed here?" Or, "Is there another way of looking at this?" Or even, "How would a really calm, wise person look at this?"
Simply asking those kinds of questions gets your mind moving. You will discover that any positive shift of perspective brings energy as well as hope.
Creativity means bringing forward a fresh response from your own mind and your invaluable lived experience. It's a prompt toward a less linear or habitual way of thinking about difficulties. This shift lets you live more empathically and generously with others, making it much easier, for example, to see things from someone else's point of view—or to switch your own point of view when that's helpful. It's about finding ways to focus less on what divides and more on what unites. It is the vital prism through which to view your "whole self."
Are you already saying, though, "Me? Creative? Are you kidding?"
No one who suffers from anxiety's many forms has a weak imagination. On the contrary, you are likely to have a very strong imagination when it comes to what 'might go wrong'. Or even for catastrophic thinking. 'This same imaginative power can work for you rather than against you', opening new possibilities as they are needed, empowering you across every aspect of your existence.
PART ONE
YOU ARE MORE THAN YOUR ANXIETY
1 | The absolute basics
Anxiety is not "all in the mind." It affects your whole body, and certainly your emotions. Those big responses you are feeling to immediate or potential unsettling or frightening situations happen within your body. They are driven by complex systems outside your immediate control that are doing exactly what they should: alerting you to danger so you can protect yourself. However, when "alerting" becomes too frequent, or semipermanent, this is exhausting and destabilizing. Something needs to be done. Something can be done.
1. Anxiety is treatable. It is the most treatable of all "mood disorders." This puts power back where it belongs—with you. However good your support, you are the most vital member of your "treating team."
2. Managing stress and reducing it wherever possible is your first major step in taking back power—and putting yourself in charge of your moods and emotions. This is not optional. Stress and anxiety are inextricably linked. No one but you can sort your priorities and put your well-being first.
3. Anxiety expresses instincts, feelings, and reactions that have a vital place in a healthy psyche. But anxiety should never dominate. Nor should it dominate the way you think about yourself.
4. You live in a wondrous physical world, and an often insanely stressful, hectic, and competitive one. Anxiety is a rational response to a world like ours. But you can reduce its sting.
5. A whole-self perspective embraces all that you are. Habits of thinking and feeling are only that—habits. Some are supporting you. Some are not. You are always more than your thoughts and feelings, however persuasive they may be.
6. When you are acutely anxious, calm your body first. When you are less anxious, you can use strategies and insights that radically broaden your choices.
7. Self-therapy brings invaluable insights from all your experiences. It gives back the power and choices that anxiety has taken away. If you have professional help, self-therapy can augment it, supporting you 24/7.
8. Insight and action are self-therapy essentials. Without action, insight fizzles into nothing (no change). Without insight, you will lack the motivation to create meaningful change—and benefit from it.
9. Pay close attention to where you give your time and attention. Reduce what lowers your spirits and elevates your stress levels. Living with Zen equanimity is not the goal. Feeling fully alive is.
10. Befriend your mind—especially if you feel that your mind (along with your brain) has been causing you suffering. You are more than your mind (and thoughts), and taking steps to reduce stress and radically reduce mental and emotional overload is essential for your well-being. Speak and think about your mind positively: "feed it" richly through what you reflect on, "take in," and make your own. Use your creativity to enlist freshness. ("Could I look at this—or myself—somehow differently?") Creativity is a precious gift of human existence, as your whole mind is.
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